03 June 2009

Day Two Hundred Fifty-Seven.

I think I am in need of a little R&R. Work lately has been a bit overwhelming with the short amount of time I have left there and of course the economy and things piling up on my desk. I feel like I am stressing a little too much on my to-do list and what needs to be accomplished before I leave and when I get to our new home. I also feel up in the air about going from working every day since J left to worrying of how things will feel once I get back and things slow down and I'm not working. Mainly my sanity and pushing through the last few months with not as much on my plate. Maybe a little time to do the things I have been wanting to do this year and haven't been able to get to being on the go all the time will help.

I feel burnt out. I have been hitting the snooze one too many times in the morning, going to bed earlier, feeling tired at work, and tonight I just couldn't push myself to run as far as I have been. Heck I just typed this on my BlackBerry because I didn't want to get up to get on the computer haha. Honestly, I haven't "spoiled" myself much since J left or have had "me time" other than our time together on his leave and a few shopping trips. I always have a guilty conscious that I am enjoying myself or spending money when Jason is working hard or it could be spent on something for us together or that I won't be working later. HELP! I am thinking about leaving work early on Friday and taking an overnight trip with a friend for some shopping and to the zoo, but I want to go without the guilt. Guilt that I should push through or I'll have time later to relax and shouldn't take off work. Am I the only one the feels like this about things?!


Lisa said...

I hear you completely!! I haven't taken a real vacation since last year. (I went to my mom's for two weddings for long weekends, but I don't really count that)

I'm so burnt out, so tired, and sleeping in. My running motivation is gone (which is bad, because I have a half marathon in a few weeks!). It's hard to feel relaxed right now.

I say you deserve a vacation! I'm sure Jason would agree that you should take time for yourself too!

lola said...

I get that way too. I want to enjoy things without the guilt, but sometimes you just need to realize that you've been working hard and deserve a little something now and again. Life isn't easy, and you should take advantage of little things when you can! :)

Post Tenebras Lux said...

Hey--relaxing and taking care of yourself is important for Jason's sanity, too. If you wear yourself out and get over-stressed or sick, it adds stress to his life. Ditch the guilt and go play on Friday =).

Anonymous said...

I'm with you. Completely Burnt Out. I am running away.

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said...

I think you deserve to do something fun for yourself though. Yes, he's working hard but so are you. You've had to keep everything at home running smoothly. I think you should take the weekend and enjoy yourself! He won't mind at all!

Unknown said...

GO! GO! GO! Because lets face it, once you get to Alaska your shopping days are over:p NO need to feel guilt when you really need a reprieve but if you are, just look at it that way! Take that day and enjoy it...Sounds like yout toally deserve it with all that stress you've been under.

Terra said...

I completely understand where you are right now, and I'm in a very similar boat! My Hubby's deployed also and I too haven't taken much time for me and every time I spend any money on myself I feel so guilty! But I am learning to tell myself this: Yes he works hard, but I am here working just as hard and doing everything I need to keep things going. Doing things for myself is ok and it will help me to feel better and also help to me to keep my sanity! If you don't treat yourself and take care of yourself and do something for YOU every once in a while you are going to go crazy! Relax...everything will work out just fine! Even if it's just getting a mani/pedi...I bet you will feel like a million bucks after you do! :) keep smiling!

Mrs. Mootz said...

You so better take the trip!! And don't even think about feeling guilty!

I totally hear you on this one. With Lil' Mootz and working and Stonewall not being here...ugh! I tend to feel guilty when I just want some alone time and I feel like it makes me a bad mom that I want some time away from Lil' Mootz. But I just tell myself, "I'm not just a mom. I'm still me and I still need the quiet time to read or catch up on blogs or sleep, so I shouldn't feel guilty." You're not just a wife or employee...you're still you and you still need to take the time to just veg or whatever makes you happy. And I've found that I feel like a better mom after I've taken some time for myself.

Megan said...

Haha i felt the same way until recently i decided i'm quitting my job after R&R in Sept. to have "Me time" for the last few months of deployment because Gosh Darn it we deserve it!!!!

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