Day One Hundred Thirty-Four.

Last day of January and it feels SO good. <3

Day One Hundred Thirty-Three.

Another weekend already! I have found weekends to be hard like I have said in the past with trying to fill that void of being alone or missing Jason the most on Sundays. However, I feel as if I am starting to grasp the me time those two days provide me. At first I dreaded the weekends I knew I wouldn't be busy like I am during the week and I still feel that way some days. It provides me a time to do the things I enjoy that I don't get to do during the week though. I have filled my voids the past nineteen weekends (who is counting ha) with sleeping in, reading, embroidery, baking, maybe a nap haha, doing the things I love and now I am trying to learn how to sew. I couldn't imagine having no interests or hobbies. I would be one boring girl! :)

Day One Hundred Thirty-Two.

I have been trying to explain myself and get this rant out that I have for awhile now, but I don't know how. I am just going to say what I am feeling. I have had some medical "road bumps" or so it seems because nothing has or is stopping me from life. At times it gets to me, but honestly most of the time I don't even realize I have two rods in my back or that I cant bend and twist like everyone else around me. Four years ago next month I had rods put in my back to help correct my scoliosis. At the time I had two pretty severe curves, but my spine began to twist and I knew long term it was the best option for me.

For the next three years after that surgery I had great check ups. The fusion took place and my rods were stable. I have felt amazing since I overcame that surgery. When I had my appointment this year to have xrays and check my curves they seem to have moved. They are now at 17* and 20* instead of the 10* and 11* they were two years ago. My doctor tried easing my mind telling me I had far more important things to worry about (aka my husband in Iraq), but stressed how important it was for me to come back next year for xrays. We discussed the possibility of surgery if it were to get worse and that if I felt it was to go to the doctor.

Back track again about eight years ago after I was told I had anxiety I became OCD about my health. I mean if I have a bump Ill be WebMDing the crap out of it and freaking out it is the worst of worst. They say when you have anxiety you focus your negative energy on one thing and unfortunately for me it was my health. So here I am again worried since my back has been hurting in the past week or so.

Now I just cant get it off my mind. I think what scares me the most of everything is just being alone. I hate to think of having to go through something like that and how real the possibility could be and have my husband not there. I mean if I needed surgery in six months the Army more than likely wouldn't send him home for it. It just sucks that something like that makes me feel truly alone.

Annnnnd on top of that I am so ready for a family. I have felt that way on and off for the past year, but I feel more ready than ever to be a mom. I want to take that next step in life soon after deployment and it breaks my heart if there is a chance we will have to put it off for something. I know we could always have children later, but I just really have my fingers crossed that it happens soon for us and nothing comes in the way of that. Call me selfish to say that, but I have always worried something will and now it feels like a possibility. I just cant wait to have a little Jason running around the thought of seeing a smaller version of my husband makes my heart melt.

Day One Hundred Thirty-One.

Nine weeks! Whhhhat?

Ok so to many people that would seem like FOREVER, but to me it seems like tomorrow haha. I cant believe that in NINE weeks I am going to see my hubby again. It gives me butterflies just thinking about seeing him come down the terminal at the airport. Ahhh hurry up April!

Dau One Hundred Thirty.

Usually on Tuesday I would do favorites and catch up on everyone elses blog, but on this Tuesday I am exhausted. It was a long day of work, errands, and spending time with family tonight. So I will have to catch up on blogs tomorrow and do favorites next week.

I think this week is going to fly by if it keeps up like this!

Day One Hundred Twenty-Nine.

Victoria's Secret why do you do this to me? They introduce a new line called Vintage Victoria and everything in it is classy and beautiful and would look fabulous in my bra and underwear drawer haha.

On another note I got to talk to Jason today!!! We haven't had much of a conversation if at all really since the week before last. I know things are very hectic there right now, but it is always a boost to be able to hear from him and know he is well. In the end it makes me feel better and on top of the situation making it the best that I can. <3

Day One Hundred Twenty-Eight.

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.

-Helen Keller

Day One Hundred Twenty-Seven.

I remember when Jason was deployed last time how excited I would be for Saturday night. I loved going out with my friends for dinner or to a movie and to have a few drinks...ok most of the time we would end up at the bar. I never missed a Saturday night unless I knew for sure I would be able to talk to Jason that night. I always had things to do, people to hang out with, places to go, etc. Now it is Saturday night three years later and here I am typing this. :)

It is crazy how things change in only a few years. Of course marriage makes you slow down, but my desire I had then to go out or have such a busy social life is totally lacking. I sometimes miss those care free days , but above all I miss my Saturdays with Jason. After his last deployment we would spend Saturday nights on the phone for hours. I know he has never been a phone person, but being in a long distance relationship we spent hours on it and he never complained. Suddenly it was more important to me than going out. If I went out I wanted to be home in time to talk to Jason. I guess by then I should have known I was head over heels huh haha.

Now that we are married a lot of the time we will watch movies on Saturday night or play Wii way too late into the night. Every other Saturday is our date night and we take turns picking out the date. I always look forward to those days especially when his is a surprise and he wont tell me all week. It is our way to still keep that bond between us strong and to make sure we don't become completely "boring" while putting in an effort to be romantic. However, sometimes I think we would be just fine laying in bed together and watching The Colbert Report on Jason's laptop while we eat popcorn than going out on date night.

When he left so did my Saturday night. My phone isn't ringing off the hook anymore from friends who want to go out. Saturday nights are just intended to be spent at home with him. The only problem? He isn't here for it ha.

Day One Hundred Twenty-Six.

Workin' on the FIFTH month...

I wish that was the twelfth, but Ill take what I can get...much better than one I guess.

I CAN'T WAIT to hit the half way point. I am so ready to see 50% gone and out of the way. :)

Day One Hundred Twenty-Five.

I miss you mister!

Day One Hundred Twenty-Four.

I am IN LOVE with The Real Housewives of Orange County. I could lay on the couch all day and watch that crap. I have liked every season so far of Real Housewives (especially Atlanta), but the constant bitching between the ladies in the OC amazes me. I totally wish I could go ape shit at Fred Siegel and spend all kinds of money, have a fragrance made for me, and ride there in a limo. Maybe I shouldbe a Real Housewife in the OC haha!

I love reality TV. I think my husband may too or he just puts up with watching a lot of it because he loves me haha :)

Day One Hundred Twenty-Three.

Tuesday Favorites!

"C"

Coupons are amazing little things when you have to grocery shop in Alaska. We save a ton of money by shopping with them and proud of it haha.

My life is full of countdowns and count ups and I might just love it. :)What girl doesn't love Coach really?

I love cookies. I love baking them and especially eating them haha.

Coffee! Yum yum.

What are your favorite things that start with C? Tell me!

Day One Hundred Twenty-Two.

My computer crashed at work today. Mondays really do suck.

It was such a stressful day around the office that I couldn't wait until quitting time. I usually am excited at the end of the day anyway ha, but I met up with my mom and had a cup of coffee. I love when we can do that on hectic days.

I also did awesome at the gym tonight and worked my butt off. I thought I was going to talk to Jason so I went earlier than normal, but that ended up not happening when I got home. We haven't talked too much lately and I sure do miss him. Hopefully tomorrow I will hear from him. We shall see :)

Day One Hunded Twenty-One.

I had the perfect weekend. I went out to dinner on Friday with some coworkers and then spent the rest of the weekend relaxing. I had plenty of "me time" and was able to talk to Jason on Saturday for a little while. Usually I always have something to do during the weekend and this weekend was the same, but the weather was not my friend so I had to reschedule with Ellen.

I did pilates for the first time yesterday and omg my legs kill. The end :)

Monday always comes too quickly!

Day One Hundred Twenty.

I should have discovered SparkPeople forever ago. I love the fact that I can track my nutrition and what I eat each day. I also love that I can workout and put in what I did to see how many calories I have burned. I am still discovering all the benefits of the website, but seriously it is like having my own fitness coach haha.

Do you use SparkPeople?

Speaking of fitness I have to brag...just a little. Every unit on post is doing "Walk to Iraq and Back." The point of it is to calculate the miles you walk and turn them in. They have groups doing walks at the gym or treadmill groups etc. The kids are even able to walk at recess and add their miles to their parent's unit. It is a super great idea to help motivate spouses and even the children. The amount of miles so far has put the group from Alaska to Baghdad and now half way back home! This is where my bragging comes in...our unit is ahead by a few thousand miles. The wives are working their asses off to be at the top haha. It makes me laugh that the guys work their asses off to be recognized as "the best of the best" there and then the spouses pull through yet again on a challenge given. Yay!

Day One Hundred Nineteen.

"Someday you will find out that there is far more happiness in another's happiness than in your own."

-Honore de Balzac

Day One Hundred Eighteen.

An I miss my husband day...

After work I spent a lot of time by myself doing laundry, cooking dinner, and going to the gym. I couldn't get Jason off my mind today. I miss him so much and cant wait to share things with him again.

I miss the sound of the garage when he would pull the car in after work and how excited Emmie would get knowing it was him coming home.

I miss making new things for dinner to see Jason turn his nose up until he tries it and then finally claiming he actually likes it.

I miss all of those simple day to day things we share together after working hours.

Miss has become a popular word in my vocabulary.

Day One Hundred Seventeen.

Join a gym...check check.

My brother was able to get me a membership to the gym he goes to at a good rate and we went together tonight. We spent two hours in the cardio room, strength training, and then swimming. It feels super good to get back to working out and eating healthy.

Other than that it has been a slow week. I haven't heard much from Jason this week compared to other weeks, but that is ok :) I know he is doing good and no news is always good news.

Day One Hundred Sixteen.

Tuesday Favorites!
"B"

Jason and I have a huge collection of board games. We even registered for some when we got married haha.

I couldn't live without my bread machine.

Who doesn't love birthdays?

I'm that girl...I love beer :)Babies!

Your turn! Tell me your favorite B's!

Day One Hundred Fifteen.

I don't really need a strict diet because I am not overweight, but I do want to tone up and feel better about myself. The first stop is my food choices. I am trying to overload myself in fruit and vegetables with lean protein. I usually eat pretty reasonable, but when I don't have much of a lunch from work or even with the holidays that seems to go out of the window. I have to learn how to be more strict with what I eat. I guess this means donut girl at work will have to stop surprising me. I should have never told her I like the custard filled ones because they will forever be haunting me now when I get to work.

Next stop...the gym. :)

Day One Hundred Fourteen.

Beer? Woah!

BAGHDAD – American troops in Iraq will be allowed to drink beer while watching this year's Super Bowl without fear of court-martial.

In what is sure to be a major morale boost, Gen. Raymond Odierno, the top U.S. commander in Iraq, issued a waiver Wednesday to a strict military ban on drinking alcohol in combat zones.

Troops will gather in dining halls on military bases around the country to watch the game, which is scheduled to kick off at 6 p.m. EST on Feb. 1 in Tampa, Fla. It will be 2 a.m. in Baghdad when the live broadcast starts in Iraq.

A copy of the waiver said the consumption of alcoholic beverages will be limited to Feb. 1-2 and service members can only have two, 12-ounce beers each.

Odierno also appeared to acknowledge the sensitivity of drinking alcohol in an Islamic country, particularly considering the game falls during a holy period for Iraq's majority Shiite Muslims.

The waiver orders commanders to "keep in mind all host nation laws and customs regarding alcohol consumption" and "to exercise discretion and good judgment in enforcing these guidelines and restrictions."

U.S. troops have been banned from drinking, possessing or selling alcoholic beverages under a general order that also bans them from possessing pornography and other activities. They can face a reduction in pay or rank or even a court-martial if they violate the rule.

Drinking alcohol isn't illegal in Iraq, but is banned under Islam, and extremists have frequently targeted liquor stores.

The exemption comes as the U.S. military faces stricter Iraqi oversight under a new security agreement that took effect on Jan. 1.

I hope Jason gets two beers, but I can totally see him on patrol that night. Poor boy. Beer in April for sure!

Day One Hundred Thirteen.

Fairbanks was officially the coldest place in the United States today at -54. I think Fairbanks usually is the coldest place, but they just fail to mention it so often on TV. I love how when they do the weather on there or even in the newspaper the state of Alaska is never shown. Jason and I always laugh at how the Sunday paper for Fairbanks has the weather, but not our own state haha. I guess that goes to show Alaska really is far away. Heck they give Canada's weather for the week though.

The one thing I love about winter is the clothing. I will miss wearing Uggs and sweaters if we PCS to the south at the end of the year that is for sure.

Day One Hundred Twelve.

What a long week! TGIF :)

"Absence is to love as wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small and kindles the great."

-Roger de Bussy-Rabutin

Day One Hundred Eleven.

Happy Birthday to me!

Today Jason sent me flowers and a card with a balloon attached to the top. The flowers were beautiful and the balloon said "You're So Special." When I went to leave work and put my bouquet in the car the balloon flew off. I slammed the door and went running for it but I knew it was too late. I watched it slide across the street and into the loading dock area of a factory. I jumped in my car and drove over when it looked to have tangled itself on a post. At this point my brother (who also works where I do) noticed what was going on. When I got across the street and jumped back out the balloon took off. I was devastated as it went above and over the building. I looked in my rear view mirror and I saw my brother drive past. When I went behind the factory he passed me again and said "It is over here now!" As I went to turn around I saw the balloon float back over and by a loading dock that was closing. I was hoping it wouldn't float in there, but I had no way to get to it. Neal came back around the corner and I said "It is over here." He threw the truck in park, jumped out, went over a snow bank, and took off for the loading dock. When he got close he jumped and grabbed the balloon. He came running back with it in one hand while chanting, "I got it! I got it!" My brother knew how devastated I would be if I didn't get the balloon back. Damn thing caused a lot of trouble, but we have laughed about it all night. :)

I had a great day with my friends and family. One of my coworkers made me a cake and they gave me "java dollars" to the coffee place in town. I also received the flowers from Jason today at work along with that special balloon. It by far made my whole day when I saw it sitting on my desk. I spent the evening with family for dinner and cake. I was also so thrilled to have many phone calls all day and be able to catch up with some of my friends. It was nice at the amount of great friends and family members I have who remembered today was my day. Goodness I love January 8th!

Day One Hundred Ten.

Tomorrow is the end of the holiday season for me. My birthday is so close to Christmas that I always just consider it a part of the holiday fiasco. Ever since I can remember I knew if I didn't get a gift on the 25th that I wanted it would be the 8th. Oh the joys of having your birthday too close to the holidays!

So today is goodbye to 23 and hello to 24. I am expecting this to be a good year and a good age for me to begin a few new chapters in life. Many things to look forward to before I turn 25!

Day One Hundred Nine.

Tuesday Favorites!

Plenty of time to kill and an alphabet of twenty-six to go through. Here are my five favorite things that begin with "A." :)

Asparagus is one of my favorite vegetables.

I am totally into aromatherapy and essential oils.
I guess I have to claim some love for the Army since I pretty much share my husband with it ha.
Alaska! I promise I love it there. I could go on and on forever about how beautiful it really is. There is so much to see and do and to see Mount McKinley out your window on a clean day is pretty priceless.

I could shop my little heart out at American Eagle. :)

What about you? Do you love something that starts with the letter A? Tell me!

Day One Hundred Eight.

"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of someone else. "

-Judy Garland

Day One Hundred Seven.

Shopping? Me? No waaaay. I caved into VS again online. I saw the cutest lingerie set in store, but they didn't have my size and I ended up looking for it online (bad I know). I also have been dying for some of their sweatpants with the Georgia Bulldogs on them. I looked at them again (ever worse huh) and they were on clearance so I added it to my cart. I checked Jason's Michigan team (uh oh) and again they were cute so I added it to the cart. I always justify my spending though if we call excuses justifying. It is my birthday this week you know and a clearance is sometimes hard to pass up. As for the lingerie when April gets here I will have all the reason in the world. Would it be bad if I said I bought two shirts and a bra too? haha.

Ok I am done shopping. :)

Day One Hundred Six.

A letter! A letter! A letter!

I got back after 2am this morning, but I had to check the mail before I went to bed. I knew Jason had send a letter and it didn't get here in time before I left for vacation. When I looked on top of the mail pile was his letter in a bright green envelope! I was so excited to see his handwriting and read what he had to say as I laid in bed before going to sleep. Not going to lie it brought tears to my eyes as he talked about how much he loved me and made me smile seeing his full name signed at the end. I always laugh at how much of "chicken scratch" it really is, but seeing it signed on a letter to his own wife made me grin.

Day One Hundred Five.

On Monday vacation ends and I go back to work. Normally that would never excite me, but being in a routine and staying busy helps time pass. I couldn't imagine at this point not having that every week. I had a great time seeing my family and enjoying the warm weather and honestly can't say I am too sad to see the holidays go. I am looking forward to R&R now and the countdown has began for it. :)

Day One Hundred Four.

2009 - The year my husband comes home!

Happy New Year! :)