Day One Hundred Sixty-Two.

The end of another month. Keep them coming!

Day One Hundred Sixty-One.

I am SO thankful today is Friday. I don't know if I could handle another full day this week. I still have many things sitting on my desk waiting for me to accomplish on Monday, but for now I need a little relaxation. I may go visit some friends this weekend but for the most part I am looking forward to many phone dates with good friends, finishing a photo book for my MIL, hopefully reading some of the magazines that are stacking up, sleeping in, and drinking coffee while I lay in bed with a book.

Ok I know I know every time I plan that damn relaxing weekend it turns into me daydreaming of Jason or feeling the blues, BUT I have good vibes about this one. No worries I also made sure I had things to do incase relaxing wasn't my calling.

Did I mention putting the LAST care package together this weekend to send Monday before he leaves for R&R? You bet! It is getting to be so soon. Ahh only a matter of a few weeks until I see that face again!

Day One Hundred Sixty.

My 25

The color pink adds new appeal to any technology product to me. If it comes in pink it goes on my wish list.

I find nutrition and health to be very important and refuse to feed my husband crappy food.

I use vanilla Coffee-Mate in my coffee every morning.

I would vote Sarah Palin for President any day.

When I first met my husband I told him I would never date someone in the military and he claimed he would be a bachelor his whole life so it didn’t matter haha that went far.

I think claiming best friends can be catty and that if you are married and you don’t think your spouse is your best friend there could be a problem.

I hope to add a dog and three kids to our family…one day.

I have a habit of staying up late online in bed when Jason is gone.

I use to want to be a journalist until I took a child development in high school and realized my real passion was with children.

I read textbooks, articles, websites, etc on developmental growth and babies for fun. It does help that I own most of it for school and my jobs as a nanny and teacher, but I one day will probably be the most paranoid over informed mother around.

I have learned to laugh rather than cry (most days) that I live alone more often than not with the amount of time Jason spends training, being deployed, and going to the field.

The best advice someone gave me before my wedding was to look at my husband when I walked down for his reaction and no one else’s because everyone would be looking at me as the bride. I can’t even tell you who I saw when the doors opened because I was so focused on him and his big smile. Maybe I was the only one that saw it, but it still makes my heart melt thinking about it.

I have a wine bottle collection.

I love potatoes friend, baked, au gratin, on the grill, in a casserole, pretty much anyway them come and of course fattening. They are my favorite food.

I’ll be a Tahoe mom before a van mom.

I have always thought I wanted to visit Italy more than any other country, but now I think my top choice is Switzerland.

I could bake all day because it never gets old to me. I pretty much love it.

I have expensive taste but very rarely do I indulge in it.

I never liked wine until Jason and I had a glass when we went out to dinner to celebrate our engagement. My cousin suggested Riesling to us and we have been hooked ever since.

I want my future children’s gender to be revealed at birth instead of in an ultrasound.

Trace Adkins is my celebrity rush sitting pretty next to Kevin James. One can sing to me while the other one makes me laugh.

Captain Crunch is my favorite cereal. I don’t buy it often because I know the end result is me eating the whole box.

I stopped eating fast food “beef” over ten years ago.

I would one day like to visit Hershey, PA so I can eat extreme amounts of chocolate and ride all the rides at the theme park. Maybe not too many roller coasters since that always results in me telling Jason how much I dislike him haha.

My least favorite holiday is Christmas.

Day One Hundred Fifty-Nine.

Each year I really enjoy the challenge of Lent and giving something up that I feel will better myself as a person. I love the idea of food products and/or things we over indulge in, but I always feel like after 40 days it may teach me nothing.

I have a few ideas floating in my head and still haven't made a final decision yet.

I have to say though that this year I am more excited to what comes towards the end of Lent...my husband. :)

Day One Hundred Fifty-Eight.

Today was a challenge.

It was one of those days that really tests you during deployment.

I had a bad feeling in my gut last night like I knew something was wrong, but I felt Jason was okay in it. It was very odd and then today I found out my bad feeling was accurate. Besides some very sad deployment news I ended up spending the majority of the afternoon/evening at the ER with my brother who is pretty darn sick.

Between the news, work, my brother, and the gym I am just mentally and physically exhausted today.

Day One Hundred Fifty-Seven.

Every time I think I am at the end of my to do list I always have something more to add. My least favorite things on that list consist of paying bills and calling customer service. One leaves me with less money and the other makes me listen to horrible music. So today was one of those days to accomplish part of the never ending list.

I paid a few bills, dealt with insurance, reserved some things for R&R, and did my grocery shopping. I wanted to try to slip out of work for a little while to head to the gym, but that didn't end up happening. I did go later which made me proud of myself. I had a massage after work/dinner and went to the gym from there instead of going home. Yay!

I just gave Emmie a new bone and I am heading to bed. Goodnight!

Day One Hundred Fifty-Six.

"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us."

-E.M. Forster

Day One Hundred Fifty-Five.

I find it funny how much I look forward to a day that I have no plans so I can relax and then when it gets here I am sad. I spent the day reading, watching movies, chatting with Jason this morning, and catching up with some friends on the phone. Pretty relaxing right? By the time I ate dinner and night began to fall sadness came over me at the thought of no plans and another night alone.

After five months by now I would think I would realize I have the same outcome each and every time. It will probably be that last relaxing day I have before Jason comes home that I actually feel okay with a night of nothing spent by myself. :)

Day One Hundred Fifty-Four.

I was super sad today to wake up to an email that we would be getting a new FRG leader. I know in time it was going to happen, but when we already have a crappy FRG I felt like our leader did bring some hope to it. I really hope in the future the new leader will be just as great or even better, but it just seems like more to add to the plate when we are going through a deployment. Our FRG really hasn't stood out as far as gathering and checking in with one another during deployment so hopefully now it will have a glimmer of more hope to come. I will be sad to see the current leader and her family continue on because she has been so great especially to my husband and I.

I am only of those wives who really believes in the FRG and being a part of it. I know it gets a bad rep all too often, but if it wasn't for them I don't think many wives realize how clueless we would all be about dates or events and even some of the things our husbands are doing at work. It makes me sad to hear and see so many wives who don't want to be apart of it.

Ohh well.

In good news I bought THE boots...yep the Steve Madden's. Ohh and Jason I promise they are worth the money. Heck I may pick you up in them in a month and some change haha.

Day One Hundred Fifty-Three.

Isn't that the truth? haha <3

Day One hundred Fifty-Two.

I had a super long day at work...actually I didn't get done until after 8:30pm tonight. I did a lot of manual labor work tonight so hopefully I will be to sleep before my normal midnight.

Happy Hump Day though :)

Day One Hundred Fifty-One.

Call me bitchy but I am on edge about complaining today. I do my fair share of complaining about deployment, the Army, the military, my husbands job, whatever it may be some days, but I try not to make a habit of it. I think sometimes it is fun to point fingers at the above when Ive had a bad day haha. However, you can only dish out so much of it. Many days I wake up and go on with my life as if I have my own because that is the attitude you are suppose to have right? Yes some days are very hard, but I don't feel the need to remind the world that each and every day my husband is gone and I am sad. *As a side note it could also be dangerous to do so if you live alone.

So my point is none of this is a walk in the park and being without your husband and my husband sucks. I know this and everyone else who has a SO that is part of any other branch of the military does too. I have a low amount of sympathy to read each and every day on peoples "status" and/or messenger and/or blogs that they miss their husband. I miss mine too, but I don't feel it is healthy to whine every day over it. We all know what job they signed up to do and it is hard I get that, but it is the best time to be positive not just for yourself but for them too. Not every day has to be happiness, but if you are reminding me, the world, and yourself on a daily basis time apart will always be just as hard especially on yourself.

Ahhh end rant :)

Day One Hundred Fifty.

I LOVE 50's!

150 days down and it feels SO good. <3

Day One Hundred Forty-Nine.

I know there are many people out there that have no interest in Valentine's Day or think it is a ridiculous holiday, but I happen to enjoy it. I guess it is the fact that it is just a special day to express your love for someone seems romantic to me. On the other hand I do know you don't need one day to do so and I feel lucky that my husband does a good job every other chance he gets. However, for each Valentine's Day we have been an item he has always done an amazing job at choosing something that surprises me or has the right words to say that make February 14th special to me. Now that I am thinking of the past ones I cant believe there has been four haha.

Jason called yesterday morning and woke me up. He had sent a box that I received the night before and I was able to open it while he was on the phone. Inside was a bear for Emmie and a box of Godiva chocolates (above) with a card. He had a picture of us put on the card along with a small message he wrote wishing he could be here. <3

It makes me a sad panda to say only one of my boxes made it to him and it wasn't his Valentine's Day gift. Hopefully soon though.

Day One Hundred Forty-Eight.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Jason was amazing today like always :)

I hope everyone had a great day together or apart! <3

Day One Hundred Forty-Seven.

I lost a diamond in the ring Jason gave me for Valentine's Day last year.

I was super sad because I never stuck to the warranty thing and went to have my rings checked like I should. I ended up talking to customer service who referred me to the jewelry store close to me. The lady there said she would help me out and get the paperwork sorted to get my rings back under warranty. It was such a relief because I didn't want to feel like Jason was disappointed in me or more like at myself. I got there today and she ended up checking my rings and sending in the one I wear on my middle finger to have the diamond replaced. She cleaned my rings and signed my paperwork . Now I have pretty shiny rings and one that is MIA for hopefully only a week. I feel so much better :)

I also am having a love affair with these...

but I haven't decided if Jason would kill me yet for spending $120 on them haha.

Day One Hundred Forty-Six.

On Monday I am suppose to go down state to meet with the condo owner we are renting from in April to finalize paperwork and go over stuff. Although it is a long drive I am kind of excited to finalize the plans and have something confirmed for R&R. I was thinking when I go I could swing over and see Jason's family if that works for them. I told my sister-in-law I would stop by and see her and our nephews and I haven't had time to yet. Maybe I will do that and go see my MIL. I should call her actually now that I think of it. I haven't heard from her in about a month and that is odd. I usually hear from her once a week or so.

Ok now I am just thinking out loud haha. :)

Day One Hundred Forty-Five.

What is this R&R stuff? It seems like so many people I know are currently enjoying midtour leave or are anxiously awaiting their husbands arrival. I am consumed in all the R&R glory. I love seeing pictures or even a few videos of that first time people see each other again. It never gets old haha.

Sooo as happy as I am for everyone I am so excited for my moment. I know I have a little while to go...about fifty-ish days and I am more and more anxious by the day. I can imagine the smile on Jason's face already and all the emotions I will feel when I see him at the airport. It will be six and a half long months at that point and all completely worth it.

I am totally jumping him haha...

Hurry up R&R! <3

Day One Hundred Forty-Four.

The weather warmed up today and I was able to clean my car AND walk Emmie on a long walk after dinner. It has been so cold the past few months that it was surprising to have some good weather.

Now I am off to bed. It has been a long day!

Day One Hundred Forty-Three.

Am I right or am I right?

No matter how much you prepare as a spouse for deployment or feel like you are ready or you have it completely down you aren’t. Although it is your significant others job you would like to think that for them being away from you is a little easier. I mean aren’t they always preparing for the "mission first?” Even if it is not the case they seem to deal with it better, and lets be completely honesty all of those emotions we both may feel as women we tend to show it more. When you spend as much time apart as a deployment gives it can often take a toll on you. I know it can’t be easy for either side of the party, but sometimes to feel like you are missed just as much as the person you are missing makes things seem a little easier. There is nothing better than having a phone call, an email, a message, anything just to say, “Hey you know what I was thinking of you and just want you to know I miss you.” I know it doesn’t have to be something you hear often, but there are days where it would be nice to know after so long apart all the missing you are doing is reassured that someone else is doing the same amount of missing you.

Day One Hundred Forty-Two.

I watched Grace is Gone this weekend. I always said I wouldn't watch it especially with Jason overseas and I ended up doing so yesterday. I have to say though I feel like I have become numb to the situation that I and thousands of other families are living in.

Overall I would watch it once and call it good.

Other than that where did my weekend go? I am excited for another week to start. Today just annoyed me really :)

Day One Hundred Forty-One.

<3

Day One Hundred Forty.

Sad face.

Today I was going through my saved messages on my BlackBerry. As I went to delete one I accidentally hit "delete prior" and everything under it was gone. Normally this wouldn't bother many people as much as it has for me, but I did have a bunch of saved messages from my husband. You know how you keep the messages that means something or make you smile? Yea yea yea admit it we all do it especially when our husbands aren't around. Well now I have nothing. I am pretty much a sad face at this point.

Too bad he isn't in an area where his phone works and he could send me one to add to my now empty folder. Boo!

Day One Hundred Thirty-Nine.

We have America's worst dog. I once though about sending her to obedience school..okay maybe ten times I toyed with the idea. Jason thinks his dog is the best dog ever though and doesn't think she would need it so it always changes my mind. At Christmas time we went over a list of questions together and if you score so many points your dog more than likely needs training. Emmie failed THE WHOLE test. This dog has a personality like no other. She is a six pound "big dog." She chases squirrels and ravens, barks at the windshield wipers in any car or the car next to ours, pounches on objects like a cat, scratches the shower floor when someone gets out, throws her food around (and the girl has some distance), and even sleeps on her own pillow. Sure there is much more like how she chases my MIL's cat around or walks around the house for an hour with a cookie in her mouth trying to find the right spot to hide it or even the fact that she bites one object in a fit towards getting another object from us. I could go on and on about Emmie and how spoiled she is, but the sad part is she knows she has Jason and I wrapped around her little paw. She knows by going potty on her pad she will get a treat so at night she will tinkle (literally a tinkle lol) on her pad and let Jason know so she can get her yogurt drop. Some nights she will go back to the pad up to five times and when she doesn't get her treat she refuses to get off of him. It makes me laugh thinking of him setting her down and she is baaack. She knows how to work her magic. So I have put more thought into "boarding school" for Emmie and as cute as she is maybe she needs some help getting a clue. I mean most dogs don't wait for their pillow to be fluffed at night, but this girl does. I know we are her enablers haha, but sometimes I wonder about adding on to our family with Emmie's ideas of being a princess. Someone once said she would grow out of it lol but Emmie is no longer a puppy and has never grown out of it.

Ahh the more I type about her the more I laugh. I probably could never enroll her in school knowing that like Marley and Me we would be on our way home early because Emmie just didnt pass class. She is lucky we love her. ;)

Day One Hundred Thirty-Eight.

I miss you most when I'm sad. I miss you when I'm lonely. But most of all, I miss you when I'm happy.

-Author Unknown

Day One Hundred Thirty-Seven.

It seems like it has been such a long week already and it is only Tuesday!

Tuesday Favorites.

"D"

Dogs especially this very special one below...

Seriously this is the best pizza you can buy. Jason and I usually have it on pizza nights instead of ordering anymore because delivery and pizza in general in Alaska is ridiculous in pricing. Every time I see it in the store it reminds me of him. I actually haven't had it since he left because it is like our thing...you know not the same without him ha.
Who doesn't love diamonds?

Date night! Every other Saturday we do date night and take turns picking what we do and where we go. We decided before we got married we would do that to keep things romantic and alive between us. I love date night with my hubby I always look forward to it. :)

Perfume of choice...Diamonds by Armani. I love love LOVE it.

And now I am off to bed! Don't forget to share with my your favorite D's! :)

Day One Hundred Thirty-Six.

If you are my husband you know I am obsessed with Sugarland. I will listen to them on repeat in the car until Jason threatens to throw it out the window. I know every lyric and every song and enjoy singing them on the days I know he has heard enough haha.

I know totally random, but really write about Monday? Monday sucks you know haha.

P.S. Jason your wife loves Godiva especially around Valentine's Day ;)

Day One Hundred Thirty-Five.

The Superbowl was a GREAT game especially the last few minutes. I totally knew the Steelers had it in the bag. Yay!

Jason didn't get his beer or was it even mentioned where he is. I heard they had rules like it had to be during the game and you couldn't have any type of duty within eight hours after or something. Anyways, seriously who fits into a category like that when the game is on in the middle of the night for them. I am sure the people who got their two beers are feet up on the desk having a good ol' time haha.